I was 16 when it all started.

It all started when I was 16- seemingly out of nowhere.

Excruciating and unrelenting pelvic floor pain.

I worked with countless doctors and specialists and no one really knew what to do for me.

After years of prescriptions, crying during pelvic exams, biopsies and a surgery… there still wasn’t really an answer for me. And more importantly, I wasn't feeling any relief from symptoms.

Finally in college I started working with a pelvic floor physical therapist and OMG! I started to feel some relief. Not immediate relief, not “I'm fixed!” relief, but progress. 

Another 5 years and I was really doing better.

Now, it’s mostly a distant memory. There are tools I continue to use to stay on top of things but I no longer deal with pelvic floor pain on a daily basis.

In fact, I didn’t have any pain pop up after both of my journeys through pregnancy, birth and breastfeeding, which feels like a huge win!

How did all of this start for me? I’m not really sure.

Dancers (and athletes in general) are more prone to pelvic floor dysfunction/symptoms.

Years of hormonal birth control may have depleted my body of certain minerals and fluctuated hormones enough that it set me on a path to having pain.

Perhaps I internalized all the dangers of becoming sexually active as a teenager.

There’s no one definitive reason why it started, but what is clear is that I didn’t have any of the tools that I have now to deal with it and find relief. 

18 years later, I talk about pelvic floors everyday. I scroll through my Instagram feed and see others discussing this as well. The pelvic floor is a much more common topic now but at the time, it wasn’t. I felt like the only one in the world with these problems- especially the only one in high school/college.

Maybe you’ve been there too. Struggling with what feels like symptoms that only you have, no one else understands, and you have no idea what to do.

Here's my advice, if you'd like it:

What you're feeling is real but what's also real is that there is hope to improve, I promise. Believe me when I say I been there. I had the thought “I’ll never know life without this" so many times. I’m so glad I can say I was wrong.

If accessible, please work with a pelvic floor physical therapist. Ask around for referrals as I guarantee someone you know has worked with one and can recommend a therapist in your area.

Take the best care of yourself that you can right now. Hydration, sleep, stress, exercise- these things can all affect how the pelvic floor responds and feels.

Ignore the sentiment of “just because it’s common, doesn’t mean it’s normal”. This isn't a moral failing. Your body isn't broken. Having any type of pelvic floor dysfunction (I don’t even like using that term) doesn't mean you're doomed. Bodies adapt to their circumstances and sometimes we just need a little time and support to get back to functioning at a higher quality of life.

And sometimes getting back to a higher quality of life can mean functioning with pelvic floor symptoms because spoiler alert! we don't have to be 100% free of symptoms to live a healthy, happy and active life.